I concede that the last formal blog was many moons ago, but similar to the tide, the urge to write ebbs and flows. Today’s vision emerged from a slight annoyance during the customary listening of podcasts. It was a simple utterance, likely with innocent intent, but nonetheless elicited irritation. To provide some context, the conversation circled the peculiar set of circumstances we find ourselves in the thick of. Yes, I am referring to the plague and its abrasive interruption of our conventional workings. I assert that its presence alone exposes us to the dichotomy of the human condition; simultaneously we are reminded of our mortality and are grounded in the people and experiences that matter most. Although this moment in history may afford us the time and/or space to devote to that we hold dear, it is not without discomfort or challenge.
The specific line I referenced earlier said something to the nature of, “With this time, are you choosing to use it wisely?” The interviewee then entered an explanation of the commitment to therapy three times a week and a spiritual practice which is adhered to daily. Before delving into a rant, I would like to acknowledge that the presence of aggravation is indicative of the surfacing of my own wounds. These wounds are in relation to the “not good enough self”, which is plagued with perpetual seeking and striving to attain a “good enough self”. The irony of this striving is that one never reaches full achievement or attainment. Now, with accountability out of the way, please make room for my justification. For those that do not find themselves triggered by the above notions, you have full permission to disregard the remainder of this post.
The aversion to assertions as such is that they juxtapose notions of contentment; the moment that we find ourselves in is in some manner unbearable, or is simply not enough. It is true that this moment may be painful or difficult, but it does not denote that we “should” be elsewhere. The fact of the matter is that regardless of where we think we “should” be, we are here. Writing of radical acceptance is reductive, making it appear easy. Realistically, it requires detachment from the ego-mind, which continually distracts us from the now. This is the plight of humankind, more specifically the plight of my “I”. As is evident, the perfectionistic drive is an area of sensitivity and quite easily elicits detachment from the soul-self. In some manner, this outburst is one large middle finger to the not good enough self, a reminder to reject the temptations of striving.
The takeaway my dearest readers, is that you are exactly where you need to be, despite the rhetoric of the ego-mind. If doubt remains, the evidence against this is that you are here regardless. Yes, we all have a finite amount of time as a physical being on this earth, but how we spend this time is uniquely our own. In spite of our greatest efforts, each future moment is unpredictable and therefore cannot be procured. After all, those that project mastery have the farthest to fall for it is guaranteed that the universe will shake the ground beneath their ivory tower. The inclusion of Master Pooh was intentional; there is much to be learned from his stance of no-knowing and non-doing. I end this #thoughtfultuesday heartfully reminding you and I that all we have is this moment. As we bask in the now, may we allow life to move through us, come what may.